My scores on my final exams were better than I’d expected.
But Sendai-san hadn’t asked to see them.
Not that I wanted her to or anything, but considering how much we’d been studying together, it felt a little anticlimactic. On the other hand, it’d feel weird if I went out of my way to tell her about my results.
Still, it seemed strange—she’d been so eager to talk about university, yet didn’t seem to care much about my grades. I felt justified in finding that odd, but I couldn’t exactly just bring it up with Sendai-san either.
I put away the test papers scattered across my desk and turned up the heat on the air conditioner.
I’m probably just overthinking all this.
That was most likely it. I was probably the only one who found it strange that she hadn’t asked about my test results. Normally, it wasn’t something worth mentioning, anyway.
To Sendai-san, my finals scores probably didn’t matter, which was why, when she’d been here today, all she did was study without bringing it up. I should just think of it that way.
I picked up my mini calendar.
We were already on the last page—December. Half the month had slipped by in the blink of an eye. Only two weeks remained in the year, most of which would be during winter break.
I let out a small sigh and put the calendar back down.
It was sunny today, with no sign of rain.
Outside, it was quiet, and the only sounds inside my room were the small noises I made as I moved around.
I was used to being alone at home.
Just as I’d gotten used to having Sendai-san here with me.
Taking out my phone, I lay down on my bed. Winter break was almost here, with Christmas coming even sooner. The streets were already decorated with colorful lights, and everyone at school seemed to be in a cheerful mood. Ami kept going on about how excited she was to spend Christmas with her boyfriend, so much so that she seemed to forget all about the entrance exams coming up.
I couldn’t say I shared her enthusiasm.
I did have plans to spend Christmas with Maika again this year, just like last year, but that was it. We weren’t even planning to exchange presents.
Hanging out with Maika was always fun, and I was looking forward to it, though not as much as I had last year. I knew why, too.
It was because, other than that, I had no plans at all for the break.
As usual, my father wouldn’t be home much, and I had no plans to see Sendai-san either, so my schedule was completely open—unlike summer vacation.
I stared down at the screen of my phone.
Sendai-san hadn’t called me once since that night.
I knew it was normal for her not to call, yet I couldn’t help but wonder if my phone would ring again the next time it rained.
「―― Hazuki.」
I murmured her name softly under my breath.
Even if I were to get into the same school as Maika, I wouldn’t be able to see Sendai-san as often as I did now. Once graduation passed, I’d lose the right to give her orders.
I could find excuses to see her, but it wouldn’t be the same as it was now, where we could meet whenever we wanted.
For now, seeing each other was easy, and we at least had a reason to—even during winter break.
Sendai-san and I didn’t have the kind of relationship where we’d make plans for Christmas, but studying together over the break felt reasonable—just as we’d done over summer vacation. The rule about not meeting outside of school days didn’t mean much anymore. We’d broken it in the summer, so there was no reason to follow it over winter break.
Even with the entrance exams looming and winter break being so short, I was sure we could still find time to meet up at least once or twice. After all, considering how long summer break had been, this much seemed fair.
But Sendai-san never brought it up.
Even with winter break around the corner, she hadn’t offered to tutor me or suggested we meet up. She would hug me or hold my hand at random and say the strangest things, yet she never mentioned the one thing I expected to hear from her the most.
I reached over the edge of my bed and pulled up the tissue box with the crocodile cover from the floor. I gently ran my fingers over its body, squeezing its hand. The soft fabric felt weak, nothing like the warmth of a human hand. It didn’t move, nor did it return my squeeze.
Of course it didn’t, but still, I couldn’t shake the feeling of disappointment.
This wasn’t Sendai-san. I knew that. Yet, I couldn’t stop myself from stroking its nose and giving it a quick peck.
I sighed, petting the crocodile one last time before setting it back on the floor.
It was just a tissue box cover—nothing more. No matter how many times I squeezed its hand or kissed it, it would never become anything else. But thanks to Sendai-san, it was starting to mean something else, and I couldn’t help but sigh again.
What if…
What if I were the one to ask Sendai-san to help me study over winter break? Would she say yes and tutor me just like she did over summer vacation?
To be honest, I felt like it should be her offering. After all, she was the one pushing me to apply to the same university as her, so at the very least, she owed me that much. Plus, this desire to see her, to be close to her, all of it—this was her fault. She should be the one to take responsibility for it.
I crawled into my bed.
I tapped through a few screens, and soon, Sendai-san’s name appeared on my phone.
If I kept hesitating like this, I’d be left with nothing to do over winter break.
Although I no longer felt bound by our rules, I doubted Sendai-san would just agree if I asked her to tutor me. I had a feeling she’d refuse, even if I offered to pay her for it.
The five-thousand-yen I’d been paying her was starting to lose its effectiveness.
Maybe I’d have better luck if I offered her a trade instead.
「Ugh, this is such a pain.」
I muttered aloud, letting the words spill out along with all the thoughts jumbled in my head.
There was no reason to call her right now. It wasn’t like we had anything to talk about either.
Besides, there was still a bit of time before the start of winter break.
There was no need to panic.
I set my phone down next to my pillow.
Ave Lilium Translations 