Spring came, and we’d finished moving in.

         It was the beginning of my life with Miyagi, now free of the five-thousand-yen bills that had always passed between us.

         Without that exchange hanging over us, every day felt natural and fresh.

         Each morning, when I woke up, Miyagi was there. And when I said “good morning,” she would reply with a “good morning” of her own.

         It felt like I was finally living a proper, human life—more so than when I lived with my family, who had always heard me but never responded.

         But that didn’t mean living with Miyagi was without issues.

         There were plenty of problems between us, and it didn’t seem like she had much interest in helping me sort them out.

         I pulled out a milk pan from under the sink. After a moment of hesitation, I filled it with just enough water to make tea for the both of us, then set it on the stove.

         We didn’t own an electric kettle or a teapot.

         I had brought what I could with me, and bought whatever we didn’t have… or so I thought.

         Only after we started living here did I realize how many things we were still missing.

         An electric kettle was one of those things, and I wanted to go out and get one.

         But I couldn’t.

         And it was all Miyagi’s fault.

         I sighed.

         Just then, I heard footsteps behind me and turned around.

         Miyagi was standing there, looking half-asleep, so I greeted her.

         「Good morning.」

         「… Good morning.」

         「Want some black tea?」

         「No.」

         「What are you going to do about lunch?」

         As usual, she was dressed in jeans and a hoodie.

         She frowned at me like I was bothering her with questions she didn’t want to answer.

         Even though I said “good morning,” it was already almost noon.

         It was a Saturday, so sleeping in was fine. I wasn’t sure how far I could go when it came to interfering with Miyagi’s routine, but we lived together now, so I figured it was okay to at least ask what she was planning to eat.

         「I’ll just eat whatever.」

         「Then how about we eat together? I’ll start cooking after I’ve had some tea.」

         I asked as I took two mugs out from the cupboard.

         「I’ve got plans with Maika later.」

         She was going out with Utsunomiya again?

         I didn’t like that.

         Ever since we moved in, it felt like Miyagi had been meeting up with Utsunomiya way more than necessary.

         「So are you planning to eat here, then?」

         「I’m kind of in a hurry.」

         She gave me a response that didn’t actually answer anything.

         Was she going to eat with Utsunomiya? Or did she mean she’d just grab whatever because she was in a rush? Or maybe something else entirely?

         I couldn’t tell what she meant just from her words.

         But I knew that even if I tried to ask her directly, she wouldn’t give me a straight answer.

         「I see.」

         I replied vaguely as Miyagi disappeared into the bathroom.

         It didn’t seem like she was planning to eat here, so I quietly returned the mugs I’d just taken out back to the cupboard.

         Things had been like this ever since we moved in together.

         Miyagi hardly ever said anything.

         It felt like we’d gone back to how things were in the past.

         When I first started going over to her place, she hadn’t talked much then either, and I was never good at dealing with the silence between us. That’s how it felt now, too.

         Neither of us had gotten used to this new life yet.

         There was no longer a five-thousand-bill being exchanged between us, and now we were just roommates.

         But I wasn’t sure what that was supposed to mean for us.

         A few weeks ago, being together felt normal. Now, it felt like we were too close—but if we weren’t together, it felt like we were too far apart.

         I poured the hot water out of the milk pan.

         I knew living with Miyagi wouldn’t be all fun and games, but I didn’t think it’d be this difficult either.

         I took out some eggs and milk, grabbed a bowl, and cracked the eggs into it. After adding some sugar and mixing it together, I poured in the milk.

         Normally, I’d slice the loaf of bread with a knife, but today I just tore it into four slices by hand and tossed them into the bowl.

         As I watched the bread soak in the egg mixture, Miyagi came out of the bathroom. But before I could say anything, she disappeared into her room.

         It was a bit early for lunch, but I decided to make French toast.

         I heated a frying pan and melted some butter in it.

         The kitchen was small compared to the one at Miyagi’s place, but it was clean and easy to use.

         Still, I couldn’t shake the discomfort.

         It hadn’t really sunk in that this apartment was now my new “home.”

         I placed the soaked bread into the pan and stared at it.

         Miyagi was always here in the mornings, when we came home, and before we went to sleep. When I was in my room, I was alone, but she was always just on the other side of the wall.

         It made me feel a little nervous.

         Maybe Miyagi felt the same.

         But either way, this was probably better than living in a dorm.

         I sighed and turned off the stove.

         I grabbed a plate from the cupboard, set the French toast on it, and opened the fridge.

         I reached for the orange juice, then changed my mind and grabbed the soda instead.

         After pouring it into a glass, I set it down beside my food.

         I picked up my fork and sat down.

         Then I heard a door open.

         「I’m leaving now, Sendai-san.」

         I looked up from the French toast and turned to Miyagi.

         「Will you have a spare moment when you come back?」

         Honestly, I wanted to ask when she’d be back. But it felt like I was trying to monitor her 24/7 if I said that out loud.

         「I’m not sure.」

         She answered curtly, and before I could say another word, she headed straight for the front door.

         It felt like she was running away.

         I took a sip of the soda Miyagi always drank.

         It still didn’t taste very good.

         I didn’t like the fizzy sensation in my mouth or the way it made my stomach feel bloated, so I couldn’t understand why Miyagi enjoyed it so much. To me, soda wasn’t even something I could confidently call sweet, and I wouldn’t drink it by choice.

         I slowly brought the French toast to my mouth.

         It was something I could definitely call sweet, and I could also taste the rich flavor of butter and egg.

         The soft, moist bread helped ease my stomach.

         I finished about half and kept sipping the soda.

         University had only just started, and I hadn’t finished choosing all my classes yet.

         I didn’t know what I should take or what kind of schedule I wanted.

         They were things I wanted to talk to Miyagi about, but she kept avoiding me.

         She used to do that a lot before, too, but now that we lived together in such a small space, it hurt more.

         The small table with two chairs, meant for both of us, felt like it belonged to me alone.

         Miyagi almost never sat across from me.

         And to think, just last summer, we were making and eating French toast together.

         I sighed as I finished the rest.

         I pulled out a tissue and wiped my mouth.

         There wasn’t a cover on the tissue box.

         If Miyagi had wanted a cover, we could’ve gone to buy one together. I wanted to get an electric kettle too. There were probably other things we still needed.

         If we could just shop together, maybe that’d make living together easier.

         But right now, I didn’t even know if she wanted a tissue box cover, or if she thought we needed a kettle, because we hadn’t had a chance to talk about those things.

         And because I’d never been in Miyagi’s room before, I didn’t even know how the crocodile tissue box cover or the black cat plush were doing.

         Even though we lived together, her room felt so far away.

         I rested my head on the table and touched my neck.

         The pendant I always wore wasn’t there anymore—Miyagi said it wasn’t necessary.

         I wanted to open her door, sit next to her, and kiss her like we used to—

         「I bet that’d just make her angry, though.」

         Now that the five-thousand-yen that’d always been exchanged between us was gone, we couldn’t do those things anymore.

         We hadn’t kissed once since we went to the movies.

         I wondered if Miyagi would ever want to kiss me again.

         I’d always thought we’d be fine even without a five-thousand-yen bill between us.

         But now, more than ever, I found myself wishing there was one.

         This brand new life we were sharing together felt more difficult than I’d expected.

         I wanted to talk to Miyagi.

         No—we needed to talk.

         If things stayed like this, we probably wouldn’t be able to keep living together.

         Sooner or later, things would fall apart.

         I’d known from the start that living with Miyagi wouldn’t be easy.

         I was the one who forced her to choose this arrangement, so I felt responsible. That’s why I had to do something to change the mood between us.

         If I didn’t know how much distance we should keep, then all I had to do was find some kind of tool to measure it.

         A ruler—something that could help us figure out a new kind of closeness.

         Something that would let us be ourselves without getting in each other’s way.

         The first time I went to Miyagi’s place, we’d managed to set some rules together.

         If we could do that again, living together would be a lot easier.

         I lifted my head and picked up my phone from the edge of the table.

         I sent a message to Miyagi, wherever she was.

         『I’ll be waiting for you before dinner.』

         After a short pause, she replied.

         『I don’t know when I’ll be back, though.』

         『I’ll be waiting until you come back, no matter what.』

         It came off sounding a bit like a threat, but there was no other way to put it.

         『I’ll pick something up for us to eat before I come home, then.』

         She didn’t say what time she’d be back, but if she was bringing food, she’d probably get home around the time I got hungry.

         I replied, “I’ll be waiting, then,” and cleared my plate and cup from the table.

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The ePub for volume 4 is available for download now! Click here to be taken to the page where you can download it. Credits to Soo-jin for putting it together!

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