[Part 121] The Rules Sendai-san Must Follow (I)

         I had gone to sleep without setting an alarm last night.

         Still, I somehow woke up a little after 6 AM, which was pretty early for a Sunday morning.

         「… I’m so sleepy.」

         I pulled the black cat plush that had been lying next to my pillow into my futon and hugged it to my chest. I stroked its head as I closed my eyes.

         At night, I could always fall asleep just fine.

         But I never slept well, and I always ended up waking up way too early.

         It’d been like this ever since I moved here, and my mind felt foggy.

         It was all Sendai-san’s fault…

         Or at least, I wished I could say that—but I knew the problem was with me.

         I couldn’t get used to the feeling of having someone else in the apartment all the time.

         Sendai-san was there whenever I woke up or came back from university, and even on our days off.

         I’d gotten so used to no one being at home that now, in this new place—where someone was always there—it felt a little unsettling, almost like I was living in someone else’s home.

         Still, I felt like it helped me sleep better having familiar things I’d brought over from my old room around, so ever since we moved in, I often left the black cat plush next to my pillow.

         I took a deep breath and opened my eyes.

         A tissue box with a crocodile cover sat on the floor.

         It was a small thing, but seeing something where it belonged made me feel a little more at home.

         Hopefully, I could hurry up and get used to this new room.

         I slowly got up and walked over to my closet.

         I always hesitated about this part in the mornings.

         I wasn’t sure if I should walk out of the room in the sweats I was already wearing or if I needed to get changed first.

         Before, I’d just wake up, eat breakfast, and brush my teeth still in sweats.

         But now that Sendai-san was here, I felt reluctant to leave my room in pajamas.

         Sendai-san was probably still sleeping.

         What should I do?

         After a little thought, I pulled out a T-shirt and jeans and got changed.

         Before leaving the room, I picked up the black cat plush still lying on my bed.

         We’d made it a rule not to enter each other’s rooms without permission.

         But Sendai-san had broken the rules before.

         Just in case, I moved the plush to the bookshelf.

         It wasn’t really a big deal where it was—it was just a stuffed animal—but I felt like if she found out I kept it next to my pillow, she’d say something about it. And I didn’t like the idea of that.

         The black cat plush had now been moved from its usual spot.

         The crocodile tissue box was still on the floor.

         I’d made my bed too.

         After checking everything, I left the room.

         Sendai-san was nowhere to be seen in the shared dining and kitchen space.

         Even after I brushed my teeth and washed my face, she still wasn’t there.

         I opened the fridge and took out some orange juice.

         I poured it into a glass and looked over at the table.

         There was still a bag of leftover bread sitting on top.

         I took a seat at the table and placed my cup beside the bag.

         I didn’t know what kind of bread Sendai-san liked, so I’d bought a bunch of different kinds, and it ended up being too much for the two of us to eat for dinner.

         I didn’t dislike bread or anything, but even I felt like I’d gone a bit overboard.

         「Morning.」

         I heard a voice, and Sendai-san—who looked like she’d just gotten up—came into view.

         「Good morning.」

         「I’m going to go wash my face first.」

         She said sleepily and disappeared into the bathroom.

         I took a sip from my glass of orange juice.

         Time felt like it was passing slowly.

         Just like during lectures, every minute felt like it was dragging.

         I probably wouldn’t be able to sleep if I went back to bed, but there wasn’t much else to do out here either.

         As I sat there wondering whether to return to my room, I took another sip of my juice.

         Staring at the glass, now less than half full, I heard Sendai-san’s voice again.

         「Are you okay with this for breakfast?」

         I glanced over at Sendai-san, who had picked up the bag of bread. She wasn’t looking at me, though. Instead, she was eyeing my cup.

         「I’m fine with it.」

         「I see. By the way, you’re up pretty early today, huh, Miyagi?」

         「So are you, Sendai-san.」

         「I just happened to wake up now.」

         Sendai-san was wearing a large sweatshirt and jeans, which seemed to be her loungewear. After a big stretch, she sat down in a chair. Her eyes were so fixated on my cup that I had to ask:

         「Do you want it?」

         「Maybe just a sip.」

         「Here, take it.」

         Without waiting for a response, I passed the cup over to Sendai-san.

         「Thanks.」

         She said, bringing the glass of orange juice I’d been drinking to her lips without looking at me. She took a sip and put it back on the table.

         On mornings like this, it was hard to look Sendai-san in the eye.

         Maybe it was just my imagination, or maybe she wasn’t much of a morning person and was grumpy because of it—but either way, the air between us felt heavy. It made me uncomfortable, like I could feel it in my bones.

         「You can have it all, Sendai-san.」

         「I don’t want it.」

         「What are you going to do about the rest, then?」

         「You take it, Miyagi.」

         It didn’t feel quite like our usual conversations, but it still somehow kept going.

         Maybe it was thanks to the rules we made yesterday.

         It would still take time before I could fully adjust to life with Sendai-san in it, but it already felt a little better than before.

         Still, it felt like the conversation had nowhere left to go. Before the silence could settle in, I brought up something to pass the time that didn’t require us to talk.

         「I’m going to have some breakfast. What about you, Sendai-san?」

         I said. Sendai-san stood up.

         「Yeah, I’ll have something to eat too. I’m going to get my own orange juice. Did you want any more?」

         「No, and don’t bring any plates either.」

         「Why not?」

         「It’ll just be more dishes to wash.」

         「Well, I guess you’re right, but still…」

         She said, sounding a little dissatisfied. After a short while, Sendai-san returned with a fresh glass of orange juice.

         「You can pick whatever you want first, Sendai-san.」

         「What? I already picked first yesterday. It’s your turn.」

         「I’m okay with whatever’s left.」

         I pushed the bag of bread toward Sendai-san, who sat across from me. It slid smoothly across the table and stopped in front of her. She glanced at me, then pulled out a red bean paste and butter sandwich along with a walnut bread. After that, she handed the now lighter bag back to me.

         「Let’s eat.」

         Sendai-san said, taking a bite of her walnut bread. I followed her lead and grabbed a cream-filled bun.

         Ever since my mother disappeared from my life, I’d spent most of my time alone. But lately, it felt like I spent more time with Sendai-san than with anyone else.

         ―― Even though I wasn’t paying her five thousand yen anymore.

         I knew we didn’t need that five thousand yen between us now that we were living together.

         As I took a bite of my cream bun, I glanced at Sendai-san.

         Our relationship wasn’t the same as before.

         That much, at least, I understood.

         She had arranged for us to become roommates, and I had accepted. But even with this new dynamic between us, I still didn’t know why she had agreed to take my orders back then, especially for money she never even spent.

         For me, those five-thousand-yen bills had been a way to keep Sendai-san close. I couldn’t afford to lose them. For her, though, they should’ve been a simple reward for putting up with my orders. She should’ve spent them on things she wanted, not saved them up like that.

         And now that I knew what she had been saving them for, I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe, just maybe, I meant more to her than just money. Even though I knew that couldn’t possibly be true, I couldn’t stop myself from thinking it.

         She wanted to do things like kiss me or touch me, so I started to wonder if that was all she really wanted from me. But it’s not like I was anything special to begin with. If she’d wanted a partner, she wouldn’t have had any trouble finding one, regardless of gender. Even back in high school, I’d heard plenty of rumors about people confessing to Sendai-san. She’d even confirmed some of them herself. There was no doubt she was popular.

         Would she have spent time with me even without the five thousand yen between us?

         Would she have still listened to my orders?

         I’d never know now.

         But even without that five-thousand-yen bill tying us together, Sendai-san was still here beside me.

         And every time I wondered why, it made me incredibly uneasy. But I felt like if I asked her directly, it’d change something between us again.

         We’d both chosen to continue this relationship instead of ending it—if something were to happen to it now, it’d be troublesome.

         「Miyagi. If you don’t like that one, wanna trade with me?」

         Sendai-san asked, holding up her red bean paste and butter sandwich.

         I took another bite of the cream bun I hadn’t even eaten half of.

         「I’m fine. I was just spacing out because I’m a little sleepy.」

         「Do you wanna go out for lunch today?」

         She asked as she finished off her walnut bread.

         「Sure. After I finish this, I’m going back to my room until we head out.」

         「Okay.」

         We chatted about nothing in particular as we finished our bread. We never really had much in common to begin with, and until now, I hadn’t minded when our conversations died out. But since moving in together, the silence between us had started to feel heavier.

         As I kept looking for ways to keep the conversation going, I finished off the last of my orange juice and bread.

         「When did you want to leave?」

         「I usually get hungry around noon, so maybe around eleven?」

         「Alright, eleven it is.」

         I left it at that and returned to my room.

         I tried to pass the time by lying on my bed and reading manga.

         Even though I still wasn’t completely comfortable here, I didn’t feel like leaving my room either.

         If I went out to the shared space, I’d feel even more out of place.

         While I kept myself distracted, before I knew it, it was almost time to leave.

         I opened my closet and looked at the spring-colored skirt hanging inside.

         I pulled it out and stared at it. It was something I’d bought after we graduated but had never worn.

         I laid it out on the bed, thinking it over.

         If I put this skirt on and walked out wearing it, it’d seem like I was doing it because of what Sendai-san said yesterday. Even if the real reason was that I just happened to see it in my closet and felt like wearing it, it would definitely look like I’d done it for her.

         I put the skirt back in the closet and pulled out a knit sweater instead.

         I slipped it on over my T-shirt and left my room.

         「Ready to go?」

         Sendai-san, who seemed to have been waiting for me, asked.

         「Yeah.」

         She had changed out of her sweatshirt into a blouse.

         「Alright, let’s go then.」

         She didn’t mention anything about the fact that I wasn’t wearing a skirt.

         I knew what she said yesterday had just been something she’d said on a whim. Those words had probably just slipped out without much thought, and she hadn’t actually wanted to see me in one anyway.

         Sendai-san picked up her bag and started walking.

         I followed behind her and left through the front door.


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7 responses to “[Part 121] The Rules Sendai-san Must Follow (I)”

  1. Howdy. Looks like Angela is hell-bent on paying that debt.

    “I pulled the black cat plush that had been lying next to my pillow into my futon and hugged it to my chest. I stroked its head as I closed my eyes.” HGIEGEIon. The mental disconnect here is just beyond belief.

    “Still, I felt like it helped me sleep better having familiar things I’d brought over from my old room around, so ever since we moved in, I often left the black cat plush next to my pillow.” Yeaaaaaah, riiiiight…

    “Just in case, I moved the plush to the bookshelf.” Oh heck now she’s even self-conscious about this whole thing. She SO knows that’s not what’s going on here…

    B-but wait. Is Miyagi actually beginning to believe? It almost feels like she’s starting to piece something together here!

    Liked by 2 people

  2. But even without that five-thousand-yen bill tying us together, Sendai-san was still here beside me.

    HMM THAT’S SO WEIRD I WONDER WHAT COULD POSSIBLY BE GOING ON HERE HUH

    Liked by 5 people

  3. And now that I knew what she had been saving them for, I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe, just maybe, I meant more to her than just money. Even though I knew that couldn’t possibly be true, I couldn’t stop myself from thinking it.

    yeah the girl who begged you to be her roommate so you could live together and asked to kiss and touch you constantly and also literally licked your feet is toooootally just in it for the money

    Liked by 3 people

  4. “And now that I knew what she had been saving them for, I couldn’t help but wonder if maybe, just maybe, I meant more to her than just money. Even though I knew that couldn’t possibly be true, I couldn’t stop myself from thinking it.”

    Miyagi you are very stupid and dense sometimes. Please value yourself more…

    “Those words had probably just slipped out without much thought, and she hadn’t actually wanted to see me in one anyway”

    Miyagi, she wants those damn feet of yours. Do not think for a moment that she doesn’t want to see you in a skirt.

    Liked by 2 people

  5. So not only does Sendai prove that she hadn’t been spending the money, but she also made the push for them to live together… and Miyagi still thinks she only likes her for the money? Wtf

    Like

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