This chapter contains suggestive content intended for readers 18+. You have been advised.

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          I had no intention of letting her say no.

          And most likely, Sendai-san wasn’t going to refuse either. But even so, I couldn’t help but worry about what would happen if she did. If only she’d give me an answer already—her silence was starting to make me anxious.

          「What’s your answer, Sendai-san?」

          I urged her, who had been quiet this entire time, to finally say something.

          「Miyagi, you realize the way you worded that makes it sound like you’ll let me do what I did to you again, as long as I don’t refuse now, right?」

          「… I know.」

          I knew exactly what I was saying.

          And I had no intention of pretending otherwise.

          If it meant I could touch Sendai-san today, then I was willing to use my future self as a bargaining chip.

          「Okay, then it’s fine as long as you know what you’re getting into.」

          Sendai-san said in a soft yet firm voice.

          She stared at me without blinking, and I wanted to look away. But if I did, it would feel like what I was about to do to her was unbearably wrong, so I couldn’t bring myself to close my eyes or avert my gaze.

          「Does that mean you’re giving me the okay, then?」

          I asked.

          「That’s exactly what it means.」

          She replied.

          Normally, Sendai-san would’ve smiled, but today she didn’t. Her expression remained serious, and that alone made the air between us heavier. It felt like what we were about to do carried far more meaning than it should have, and I wanted her to act the same as always. For her to look so composed at a time like this felt unfair.

          「Alright, then for your part of the deal… bring me two towels.」

          I said to Sendai-san, who had assumed on her own that I’d kissed her as part of a trade, my voice neither too loud nor too soft.

          「Wait, what? Earlier I asked if you’d kissed me just so I’d let go of your hand, and you told me no. So I figured what you wanted was for me to let you do whatever you’re planning. Was I wrong?」

          「What I plan to do to you is meant to be in return for what I let you do to me before, so it has nothing to do with this trade.」

          「… Oh, I see. So, what are you planning to use those towels for?」

          「Just bring them over.」

          「You’re such a pervert, Miyagi.」

          Sendai-san spoke in the same tone as always, but her expression was different. Her eyes were fixed on me, unreadable.

          「I haven’t even done anything yet, or said what I was going to use them for.」

          Even though this conversation felt like ones we’d had in the past, my voice came out stiff.

          「Yeah, but whenever towels were involved, you’d always use them to tie my hands or blindfold me.」

          「If you already knew what I was going to use them for, why even ask?」

          If Sendai-san was going to wear an expression so different from her usual self, then I just had to cover it. If I couldn’t see it, I wouldn’t have to think about it. And restraining her would probably make me feel even more guilty than I already did, but it was the only way to be sure things went the way I wanted.

          「Fine, I’ll go grab some.」

          Sendai-san said reluctantly, standing up. She went to her dresser and came back holding a white towel.

          「Here you go.」

          She placed it over my head before sitting down on the bed. My eyes followed her, and I turned toward her. The towel slipped off my head, but I caught it before it hit the floor. That’s when I realized there was only one.

          「Where’s the other one?」

          「You only kissed me once, so you only get one towel. Use it however you want, though.」

          「You’re so mean.」

          「I think you’re the one that’s being mean here, Miyagi.」

          Sendai-san said, poking my side with her foot.

          Our positions had been reversed.

          Back when I had Sendai-san lick my feet, I was the one sitting on the bed while she sat on the floor. But now, it was the other way around.

          I grabbed her ankle.

          Her jeans covered her legs, leaving almost nothing exposed. When I looked up, I saw her bare arms showing from her short-sleeved T-shirt.

          She wasn’t in a school uniform, and she wasn’t even wearing a skirt, yet somehow, I felt like what I was looking at now was probably the same sight she’d always seen. I had no intention of licking her foot, but it left a strange feeling inside me.

          「So, what are you going to do with the towel, Miyagi? If you haven’t decided yet, how about not using it at all? What do you think of that?」

          Her voice came from above, and I answered without hesitation.

          「Close your eyes. I’m going to tie it now.」

          「Out of curiosity, what were you going to tie my wrists for?」

          She asked, not closing her eyes.

          「So you wouldn’t do anything strange while I’m doing things to you.」

          「Well, I’m not going to do anything, so you don’t need to worry about that. Then why do you want to blindfold me?」

          「I just don’t want you to see me.」

          I couldn’t tell her the real reason—that her expression looked too different from usual—so I gave a different excuse.

          「You know, that should be my line. I feel like I’m the one who should be embarrassed about being seen.」

          「Shut up, Sendai-san.」

          She’d always been talkative, but today it felt like she was speaking even more than usual. Thinking we’d get nowhere like this, I stood and moved to cover her eyes with the towel. But before it touched her, she grabbed my wrist.

          「I’m fine with you blindfolding me, but can I see you smile before you do?」

          Her voice was soft, and she smiled at me as if encouraging me to do the same.

          「No.」

          「Then at least kiss me.」

          She replied instantly, as if she’d already known I would refuse to smile.

          I had no reason to deny this request, though.

          I leaned in slowly, and Sendai-san closed her eyes. I gazed at her beautiful face for a moment before pressing my lips against hers, softer than the towel in my hand. But before I could take in their warmth, I pulled away and covered her eyes.

          「I can’t see anything now.」

          「It’d be a problem if you could.」

          I gently touched her shoulder, and she lay down on the bed. Sitting beside her, I turned off the lights with the remote and set it down.

          「… Face that way, Sendai-san.」

          「Where?」

          「Toward the wall.」

          Her eyes were covered, and the lights were off. Whether she faced me or not, neither of us could see the other. I knew that, but still, my heart fluttered when she faced me.

          「Isn’t this a little too much?」

          「Who cares? Just turn that way already.」

          I said, pushing her body toward the wall.

          「― You won’t be able to kiss me at all if I do. Is that okay with you?」

          「Yes.」

          I answered curtly, and Sendai-san reluctantly turned toward the wall. Seeing how quickly she accepted whatever I told her to do made me feel guilty.

          Touching Sendai-san just to soothe my own uneasiness felt like I was disregarding her feelings entirely. I was always letting my emotions take the lead. She was always so considerate toward me, yet I couldn’t even be half as considerate toward her.

          I never did anything properly.

          I never treated her properly, and even now, I didn’t really have a good reason for why I wanted to touch her.

          But I didn’t think I was wrong.

          This was the only way I knew how to be with Sendai-san, and there was nothing wrong with wanting to touch her. Maybe it wasn’t how roommates were supposed to act, but that didn’t change the fact that we were still roommates. Plus, she was the one who had said it was fine for roommates to do things like this anyway.

          So, it should be okay to touch her.

          After justifying it, I lay down beside her and wrapped my arms around her from behind. Our bodies pressed together, and I felt her through the thin fabric of her T-shirt. This was probably the first time I had ever hugged her entirely of my own will.

          「Miyagi, you’re holding me really close.」

          「So what?」

          「Oh, it’s nothing… As long as you’re okay with it.」

          Sendai-san’s voice was awkward, but then she fell silent.

          She was right—we were extremely close. Even through her clothes, her warmth spread into me, and the faint scent of her shampoo reached my nose. My heart pounded so hard I worried she might hear it. But the more of her I touched, the more the unease inside me faded.

          I slipped my hand under the hem of her T-shirt. Her body twitched when my palm pressed against her stomach. Resting my forehead against her back, I let my hand drift from her navel to her side.

          「Sendai-san.」

          I called her name out quietly.

          「What is it?」

          Her soft reply made my heart jolt, and I lifted my forehead from her back as if afraid she’d notice. After a shallow breath, I moved my hand to her back and started tracing downward from her neck. Even when I pressed against the spot behind her heart, I couldn’t feel it beating, but her body was hot against my palm.

          I pressed my lips to her shoulder through the fabric of her T-shirt, and she shifted slightly.

          My hand slid lower over her waist, and my nails dug lightly into her skin. A faint breath escaped her.

          I let my hand wander upward again, brushing lightly over her breast through the fabric. The cloth was all I could feel. Since she didn’t say anything, I let my fingers trace the shape carefully, brushing over it without pressing down. I could feel the lace and seams of her bra, but it wasn’t the warmth or softness I wanted, like when I touched her stomach. I wanted to feel her directly.

          I brushed over her collarbone, then trailed my hand to her back, and my fingers found the hook of her bra.

          「Can I take it off?」

          「Only if I get to do the same to you.」

          Sendai-san answered quietly.

          「I’m not letting you do that. But I really want to take yours off.」

          I slipped my fingertips under the clasp, grazing her spine. She hadn’t said yes, but she hadn’t said no either. To push her for an answer, I bit her shoulder through the shirt. Her back stiffened. But still, she said nothing, so I unhooked it anyway.

          「You’re such a pervert, Miyagi.」

          She muttered, but I ignored it, sliding my hand forward and under her bra.

          Her breast was warm against my palm—softer than I’d imagined, yet firm at the center where a point pressed back into my hand. The small hardness there made it clear how she was reacting, and it stole my breath away.

          「Sendai-san.」

          I whispered her name and pressed harder, but she gave no reply. All I could feel was the hardness beneath my palm. When I brushed my fingers over it, her body jolted in response. Knowing that was her way of reacting to my touch, my breath caught in my throat. My heart was pounding so loudly it echoed in my head, and I almost wanted to cover my ears. But more than anything, I just wanted to keep touching her.

          「Sendai-san.」

          「Y-Yeah?」

          Her reply sounded almost normal, but a faint breath slipped into her voice. That single sound sent my heart racing, and I wanted to draw out more of it.

          I circled that point with my fingertip, then cupped her breast fully. The softness never changed, but that small hardness kept growing beneath my touch. Slowly, gently, I kept caressing her. With every movement, her back arched toward me. She looked so cute like this.

          It made me want more—to take off her clothes, to see her whole body. To turn on the lights and mark her chest, her collarbone, and then touch those marks until I was satisfied.

          But when I tried lifting her shirt, she caught my hand and held it tight. Unlike with her bra, this was unmistakably her way of saying no. Last time I’d told her not to take off my shirt either, so I couldn’t complain. If I forced it now, she might stop this altogether.

          「I won’t take your shirt off, so let go.」

          I said quietly, and she released me.

          It would have been a problem if she stopped letting me touch her.

          I still hadn’t learned everything about her body yet.

          I pressed myself closer against her back. My hand stroked her breast again, my fingers brushing the tip, and I kissed her shoulder softly through her shirt.

          「How long… do you plan to keep… touching me for?」

          Her voice broke at uneven intervals, weaker and more unsteady than earlier. Wanting to hear more of that sound, I cupped her breast.

          I had the same thing on my own body, but touching hers felt so good that I didn’t want to let go.

          「Miya…gi.」

          She called my name with a firm tone, clutching my wrist. Her back trembled, and her breathing was uneven.

          「That’s enough, isn’t it?」

          Her voice was soft as she guided my hand down, resting it just beneath her ribs.

          There was no bone there, only softness under my palm.

          I caressed the spot for a moment before moving my hand to her side and digging into her skin.

          「That hurts.」

          Sendai-san said in a reproachful tone.

          I bit into her shoulder and pressed my hand harder into her side.

          Her sweaty skin clung to my palm, and with no space left between us, her warmth seeped into me. Only then did I notice how hot my own body had become.

          I moved slightly away from her back and slid my hand below her belly button, until my fingers touched the button of her jeans.

          If I undid this, I’d be able to learn more about Sendai-san’s body.

          The thought of that made me nervous, and the memory of what she’d done to me flashed through my mind, overlapping with the Sendai-san in front of me.

          On this bed, I―

          The memory struck again, and my focus dropped to my stomach. As my body reacted, I became fully aware of what I was about to do.

          A part of her I had never touched.

          A place inside Sendai-san I didn’t know.

          I was about to touch her there.

          The past tangled with the present. Caught in that memory, my hands clumsily fumbled with the button of her jeans.

          「… Undo this for me, Sendai-san.」

          「Undo it yourself.」

          「I can’t. I need you to undo it.」

          I pressed my palm flat against her stomach. She didn’t move, even when I pushed a little harder. I rested my forehead on her shoulder and whispered again.

          「Do it.」

          This time, she slipped the button open.

          「Is this good?」

          Sendai-san asked as I pulled down the zipper.

          I slid my hand slowly inside, until my fingers brushed the fabric of her underwear.

          It wasn’t as though I didn’t know what to do next.

          But I was still nervous.

          Her body had reacted to every touch so far, so I thought I knew what to expect. But what if I was wrong?

          「Miyagi?」

          Her quiet voice reached me.

          I took a breath and exhaled slowly, then slipped my hand beneath her underwear. My fingers pushed further in, her jeans pressing down against my hand. Before long, I reached a place I’d never touched before, and something slick coated my fingertips.

          It wasn’t sweat. It was something stickier.

          It clung to me more than I’d imagined, leaving me both relieved and stunned.

          I never thought Sendai-san would end up like this.

          I wasn’t sure if I was doing any of it right, but her body reacted to my touch just as mine had to hers. That realization hit me so hard it felt like the blood drained from my body.

          I began to move my fingers.

          Her back shifted, rising and falling with deep breaths.

          The sensation of her reaction clung to my fingertips, as if it wanted to seep into me.

          Considering what we were doing, it wasn’t strange for her body to respond like this. She had made mine react the same way.

          But I still couldn’t believe it was my touch that was making her feel like this.

          I moved carefully, exploring the slick, unfamiliar place beneath my hand. My fingertips felt hot, and so did her back.

          When I pressed myself fully against her, the heat of her body burned through her T-shirt, making my head spin and my breathing uneven. I pressed down harder with my fingers and kissed her ear. A muffled sound slipped from her lips, and wanting to hear it more clearly, I bit her shoulder.

          「Ah… nnh…」

          Sendai-san let out a rough, strained voice.

          It reminded me of her voice when she had a cold, but now far more vivid, and hearing it made my chest tighten.

          「… Does this feel good?」

          I already knew the answer, but since her voice sounded the same in pleasure as it did in pain, I couldn’t stop myself from asking.

          「It… feels good…」

          Sendai-san’s voice was a little higher than usual, carrying a sweetness that reminded me of the cheesecake I’d just eaten.

          「How good?」

          「Is that… a question… people normally ask…?」

          Her words broke off unevenly, but her voice was still loud enough for me to hear.

          「I don’t know, but just tell me.」

          As if influenced by her, even my own voice was starting to sound a little different.

          「It feels… really good…」

          「And how good is that, exactly?」

          「It feels… really… really good…」

          「Say it in a way I can understand.」

          Sendai-san let out a sigh. She arched her back as if to pull away, so I drew her closer again.

          「Tell me.」

          I repeated myself, and as though she had given up, she relaxed her back against me and answered quietly.

          「It feels better… than when I do it myself…」

          「Oh… Wait, huh?」

          Her voice was barely audible, just enough to reach my ears, and I nearly missed it. But instead of fading away, the words lodged firmly in my head.

          I hadn’t expected that kind of answer. It wasn’t the one I wanted either, and it only left me confused.

          「Sendai-san.」

          I called her name and hugged her from behind. My head was a jumble, my thoughts refusing to come together.

          What was she like when she touched herself? What went through her mind when she did?

          And also—did she really do those kinds of things on her own?

          Sendai-san stayed silent. Wanting some kind of reaction from her, I moved my fingers, and a thin, unsteady voice I’d never heard from her before escaped her mouth.

          「Shut… up… Miyagi…」

          Her voice sounded nothing like usual. It was strained, ragged, her words broken by her breath. My own breathing turned uneven, as if trying to match hers.

          I felt like I couldn’t breathe properly.

          In the darkness, only the sounds of our ragged breathing filled the room.

          Unable to steady myself, I pressed my fingers harder against the spot beneath them, stroking her. It felt as though my fingertips were drowning in the fluid spilling from her.

          It was such a small part of her body, no bigger than a fingertip, yet that alone was enough to change her completely. Maybe anyone could do the same, but I couldn’t bear the thought of someone else changing Sendai-san in this way.

          Her body was mine, and mine alone, and I wanted to be the only one who knew this side of her.

          「I can’t… see anything, so at least… let me hear… your voice.」

          Sendai-san, who had just told me to shut up moments ago, said as she grabbed my arm.

          「My voice?」

          「Call me… by my name…」

          「Sendai-san.」

          I answered her quiet request by calling her name. I didn’t want to hear my own voice in the state it was now, but even just saying her name felt good.

          But Sendai-san seemed unsatisfied.

          「No… Call me “Hazuki.”」

          Calling her by her first name.

          If I did that, it would mean—

          「No. I’m not calling you that.」

          I refused, because once I said it, it felt like she wouldn’t be mine alone anymore.

          「You’re… so stingy, Miyagi.」

          Sendai-san said, then began calling my name again and again.

          “Miyagi.”

          “Mi…yagi.”

          I’d done the same with her name when she touched me on this bed before. Now it was Sendai-san calling mine, over and over again.

          Her voice was as pleasant as ever, and my name kept spilling endlessly from her lips. I was caught up in the sound and it pulled me down, sinking me so deep I wasn’t sure I could ever come back.

          「Be quiet.」

          I said, pressing my forehead lightly against her back.

          「Why don’t you… silence me yourself…?」

          Her voice was weak yet defiant, and when I brought my hand to her mouth, she bit down on one of my fingers. It didn’t hurt, but the surface of her tongue burned like fire against my skin, as if I’d been scalded. The moment I pulled free, she continued to call my name.

          “Miyagi, Miyagi, Miyagi.”

          Hearing her call my name over and over overwhelmed me. It felt like her voice was breaking me apart even as it filled me. It was sharp, almost painful, yet it felt good.

          Drunk on the heat, I kept moving my fingers, stroking her in uneven rhythms—pressing harder one moment, softer the next.

          「… Ngh… ahh—」

          Her muffled voice slipped into my ears and sank deep inside me.

          It brought me back to that Sunday, when her touch had made me feel the same way, and now her body was responding to mine.

          I let out a breath.

          My fingertips burned, as if they might melt away.

          When I paused, her hand gripped my arm tight, clutching so hard it felt like she was begging me to keep going, still calling my name.

          I had never seen Sendai-san like this before.

          She clung to me as if she truly wanted me.

          Her body burned hotter than ever, that heat seeping into me until I felt as though I was being undone from the inside.

          I regretted turning off the lights.

          I shouldn’t have blindfolded her either.

          I didn’t want her to see my face, but I wanted to see hers. I wanted to know what expression she wore when she called my name. I wanted her to look into my eyes as she said it. The anxiety that had gnawed at me earlier was gone, replaced with something deeper: a desire to know more of her. I wanted to know what she was thinking, what she was feeling each time she called out to me. I wanted to know everything—her past, her future, every part of her I had never seen.

          I wanted her to tell me everything, only to me, to no one else.

          Even the things I never asked. Even the things I couldn’t bring myself to ask.

          It didn’t have to be today. I just wanted her to tell me someday.

          「Sendai-san… Sendai-san.」

          I buried my face against her neck and whispered her name in a hoarse voice.

          「Shi…ori…」

          She answered in return, her voice carrying a warmth I had never heard before. It made my heart tingle as if it were burning, and I felt like I couldn’t breathe. I stroked her harder and faster than before.

          I wanted her to feel good. More than I ever did. Far more than that.

          The slick warmth coiled around my fingers, pulling me in. Her hand clamped down on my arm, and I pressed down even more firmly against her. I bit into the side of her neck, sinking my teeth in, and her grip tightened before finally slipping away.

          As I continued moving my fingers gently, I heard her call my name through ragged breaths.

          「Stop… Miyagi…」

          Sendai-san said in a strained voice as she slapped my arm.

          「Why?」

          「Why? Uh, well, you know…」

          Her voice trailed off. She drew in a deep breath and exhaled slowly before awkwardly continuing.

          「You should know why already. I can’t keep going anymore.」

          Only then did I realize what she meant.

          「Oh, sorry.」

          I pulled my hand from her underwear and turned on the lights. Sendai-san was still curled up, her shoulders rising and falling with each breath.

          Her eyes were still covered by the towel, so I couldn’t clearly see her expression.

          I shifted my gaze to my fingers. They were wet with the fluids that had flowed from her body. When I rubbed them together, the slippery sensation clung to me.

          What lingered on my fingertips were the remnants of what Sendai-san had felt—the proof that her words about it feeling good hadn’t been a lie. Realizing that the same thing must have stained her fingers on that Sunday made my face burn.

          「Miyagi?」

          Maybe because I had stayed quiet for too long, Sendai-san called my name. I kept staring at my fingers in silence until she sat up and shifted around. When I finally looked over, she had removed the towel and was staring back at me.

          「Wha—Hey, Miyagi. What are you doing?」

          Her voice was grumpy but not quite angry. She got up from the bed and, a few moments later, came back with the platypus tissue box.

          「Normally, you would’ve wiped your hands by now. I don’t see why today should be any different.」

          Muttering under her breath, she grabbed my arm and wiped my fingers off for me. The last remaining traces of her soaked into the tissue, which she tossed in the trash.

          「I thought you didn’t like getting your hands dirty, Miyagi. Was I wrong?」

          She sounded exasperated, but when I looked closer, I noticed her cheeks were flushed. Her clothes were disheveled, and it hit me again what we had just done.

          Without answering, I pressed my lips against hers.

          I wasn’t sure why I suddenly wanted to kiss her—just that, in this moment, I wanted nothing more than to feel her lips on mine.

          After a short kiss, I pulled back, but Sendai-san leaned in again. She pressed her lips firmly to mine, her tongue slipping into my mouth. She traced along my teeth before intertwining with my tongue. It was a long, deep kiss, and before long she pushed me down onto the bed.

          「I’ll make you feel good too, Miyagi.」

          She whispered just as my back hit the mattress, and I instinctively pushed her away.

          My body was still burning. If she touched me now, I felt like I would lose myself completely.

          「No.」

          I refused firmly.

          「Why not? I want to touch you too.」

          She said, sounding dissatisfied.

          「Not now.」

          「Then when?」

          「I don’t know, but I just can’t right now, so move.」

          If I let her touch me now, I knew I’d let her get away with just about anything, so I pushed Sendai-san off and sat up.

          「Miyagi.」

          She called out to me, but I ignored her as I got up from the bed. When she tugged at the hem of my T-shirt, I looked back at her. Our eyes met briefly. Sendai-san averted her gaze—something that was rare for her—before looking at me again.

          「You know, Miyagi. I—」

          Her words trailed off, and I waited for her to continue. But for some reason, she said nothing more.

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