It was 11:46 PM—almost the end of the year.

         We’d cleared away the hot pot and pudding we’d eaten earlier, and now the table was cluttered with an open bag of potato chips and half-empty cups of barley tea and soda. Beside me, leaning against the bed, was Miyagi, who didn’t seem to be in either a particularly good or bad mood.

         「Have you ever rung the New Year’s Eve bell¹ before, Sendai-san?」

         She asked without a hint of enthusiasm in her voice as she pulled a few potato chips from the bag.

         「No. Why? Did you want to go ring it?」

         「It’s too cold, so not really. I just figured that someone who goes for New Year’s shrine visits had probably rung it at least once before.」

         「I’ve only ever gone to pray and draw fortune slips.」

         「Hmm…」

         Despite being the one who’d asked the question, Miyagi didn’t seem interested in my answer as she ate her chips.

         Something was up.

         Miyagi had quietly eaten the hot pot we’d made earlier, then sat down beside me without protest and eaten pudding with me. And now she was even trying to make small talk.

         That wasn’t all, either.

         She’d shown up at my workplace without warning today, and she’d even waited to walk home with me even though I hadn’t been able to keep my promise to keep Mio and Noto-senpai away from her.

         Something was definitely up with her.

         Miyagi wasn’t the kind of person who would do something nice for me just because it was New Year’s Eve. Rain or shine, if she was in a bad mood, she’d kick or bite me without hesitation.

         I reached out and touched Miyagi’s cheek.

         A slight crease formed between her brows, but she didn’t pull away.

         I traced my fingertips over her lips before pressing my own against them. Then I touched her earring and kissed it the same way I’d kissed her lips, until she pushed me away by the shoulders.

         「I never said you could do that. Quit messing around. Can’t we just welcome the New Year in peace?」

         She said in a low voice that echoed through the room, but she hadn’t pushed me away very hard.

         Unlike me, Miyagi didn’t seem to think of New Year’s Eve as anything special, and yet she chose to spend it with me in my room anyway.

         The thought made me so happy that I moved even closer to her.

         I kissed her lips again, transferring my warmth to the girl Mio had called “Shiori-chan” and Noto-senpai had called “Miyagi-chan.”

         Both Mio and Noto-senpai seemed interested in Miyagi, but not in the way I was. They definitely didn’t want to kiss her the way I did or touch her the way I wanted to.

         I knew that perfectly well.

         They were just curious about what kind of person my roommate was, and all they wanted was to become friends with her. Even so, my heart wasn’t big enough to simply accept the new connections forming around Miyagi. I wanted to unravel the threads Mio and Noto-senpai were weaving with her and return them to being complete strangers.

         Even now, I still felt a little restless.

         I was afraid Miyagi would end up somewhere I knew nothing about.

         I knew my jealousy was selfish and a little petty, but I wanted to soothe it by doing something that Miyagi would only let me do.

         The warmth of her lips against mine was comforting.

         But it wasn’t enough.

         I brushed the tip of my tongue against her lips.

         I wanted more of Miyagi, but she wouldn’t part her lips. Instead, she tried to pull away, but I grabbed her by the arm and pulled her back toward me. Before she could protest, I silenced her with another kiss and slipped my tongue into her mouth. I slid my hand beneath her blouse and stroked her side as our tongues intertwined. Unable to voice her complaints, Miyagi bit down hard on my tongue instead and shoved me away.

         「Sendai-san.」

         She said my name in a low voice.

         「A little kissing is fine, isn’t it? Besides, the year’s almost over.」

         「That wasn’t “just a little,” and like I said before, I just want to welcome the New Year in peace.」

         Miyagi said as she pulled my hand out from under her clothes and shoved it down onto the floor.

         「Then how about you kiss me, Miyagi?」

         「We kissed just now, didn’t we?」

         「You didn’t initiate it, though. If you want me to stop bothering you so you can welcome the New Year in peace, then at least give me a kiss.」

         「You’re so annoying.」

         Miyagi stood up, looking thoroughly annoyed. Afraid she was about to leave the room, I grabbed hold of her clothes. But instead of leaving, she simply picked up the penguin plush I’d left on the bed.

         「If you want something to kiss that badly, kiss the penguin instead.」

         Miyagi said as she sat back down beside me and shoved the plush into my hands.

         I reluctantly took it from her, but I didn’t kiss it.

         The penguin was nice to hold, but it wasn’t as warm or as soft as Miyagi’s lips. It could never take her place. If I ever used it as a substitute, it would only be when Miyagi wasn’t around.

         Hugging the penguin plush to my chest, I pulled out my phone and checked the time.

         It was 11:57 PM.

         The New Year was almost here.

         「Look, Miyagi.」

         I opened the clock on my phone and showed it to her.

         「Why are you showing me the time?」

         「I just thought it’d be nice to watch the New Year arrive together.」

         I still wanted a kiss from Miyagi, but it would’ve been a shame if the New Year crept up on us while we bickered over it. I didn’t know if she’d let me touch her again once the New Year began, but as for a kiss, that could wait until after midnight.

         「I’m not doing a countdown with you.」

         「We don’t have to. Let’s just watch it turn midnight together.」

         I put the penguin plush back on the bed and rested the hand holding my phone on Miyagi’s thigh. A slight frown crossed her face, but instead of saying anything, she simply lowered her gaze to the screen.

         Together, we watched the seconds tick away until there were only fifteen left before January 1st.

         Just as she’d said, Miyagi didn’t count down.

         But I counted down silently in my head.

         Five, four, three, two, one…

         「Happy New Year.」 I said to Miyagi, and she replied with, “Happy New Year,” back.

         I brought my phone back toward myself and quietly snapped a picture of her.

         「Didn’t I tell you not to take pictures of me without my permission?」

         Miyagi complained as she reached for my phone, but I pulled it out of her reach and tucked it away.

         「Come on, it’s New Year’s. Isn’t it fine?」

         「That’s no excuse to take pictures of me.」

         「I just wanted one as a keepsake. You know, since we’re already here, we should also take one of us together.」

         Miyagi shot back with barbed remarks like, “No way,” and “That’s not fair,” her brows furrowed in irritation, but I ignored her. Just as the last day of the year was special, so was the first. That didn’t mean I could get away with anything and everything I wanted, but I figured taking a few pictures was harmless enough.

         「Miyagi.」

         I tugged on her arm, pulling her closer.

         With an exaggerated sigh, Miyagi said, “Fine. Just one picture.”

         I pretended not to hear her and snapped photo after photo of us together. One became two, then three, then four. While I was taking them, several messages came in. Miyagi’s phone chimed as well, letting her know she’d received messages as well.

         「Oh, hang on. I need to reply to these.」

         I said to Miyagi.

         「Me too.」

         We both turned our attention to our phones.

         My screen was filled with New Year’s greetings from my university friends, Utsunomiya, and Umina. I sent each of them roughly the same reply.

         「Mio and Noto-senpai asked me to wish you a Happy New Year.」

         Naturally, I’d received messages from Mio and Noto-senpai as well. Their greetings weren’t just for me—they’d asked me to pass them along to Miyagi too.

         Mio’s message read, “Tell Shiori-chan I said Happy New Year.”

         Senpai’s said, “Tell Miyagi-chan I wished her a Happy New Year.”

         I didn’t want to pass along the “Shiori-chan” and “Miyagi-chan” parts, so I kept it vague.

         Miyagi looked troubled.

         「… Tell them I said Happy New Year too.」

         She muttered, sounding slightly irritated.

         I understood why Miyagi wasn’t eager to respond to them.

         They were exactly the kind of people she had trouble dealing with.

         「Alright, I’ll let them know.」

         It wasn’t really something that needed to be passed along, but I relayed Miyagi’s message to them anyway. Replies came back almost immediately. Mio said she “wanted to talk to Shiori-chan,” but I brushed that part aside.

         「Ami says Happy New Year to you too, Sendai-san.」

         「Tell her we should talk again sometime.」

         「… Okay.」

         Miyagi replied quietly, then fell silent.

         I didn’t mind people like Mio and senpai, who were always lively. I was never comfortable with long silences. They always made me wonder what the other person was thinking, and it made me feel uneasy. I’d rather they kept talking. Mio’s habit of sticking her nose into everything could be a pain sometimes, but someone as boisterous as she was made me feel more at ease.

         But things were different with Miyagi.

         Even if there were long silences between us, and even if she was in a bad mood, being with her didn’t bother me.

         Of course, I wondered what was on her mind, but I still enjoyed simply being with her.

         I reached for Miyagi’s hand as she sat there in silence.

         「Do you want to watch the first sunrise of the year² together, Miyagi?」

         「Do we have to go somewhere for that?」

         「Nope.」

         「Does it still count as watching the first sunrise if we watch it from home?」

         「Who knows? I don’t know if it technically counts, but I’m sure watching it from home is fine.」

         「That’s a bit too casual, isn’t it?」

         「Does it matter? Let’s look up what time the sun’s supposed to rise and watch it together.」

         「No thanks. I’m going to take a bath and go to bed.」

         Miyagi said firmly as she pulled her hand free and stood up.

         She hadn’t shown any interest in watching the first sunrise when I first brought it up, but I still didn’t want her to go back to her room just yet.

         「I’ll take a bath after you. Will you come back to my room when you’re done? I want to talk a little longer.」

         「I’m sleepy. I want to go to bed.」

         「If you fall asleep, I’ll wake you up.」

         「… Do whatever you want.」

         Miyagi replied in a voice far too grumpy for New Year’s Day.

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1. Joya no kane (除夜の鐘 – a.k.a. the New Year’s Eve bell) is a Japanese Buddhist event that is held annually at shrines on New Year’s Eve. Typically, the bell is rung 108 times to usher in the New Year to clear away earthly desires. In Buddhism, this number represents the number of worldly desires that a person experiences throughout their life. ↩︎
2. The first sunrise is the tradition of observing the first sunrise of the year. This is typically done at places like coastlines, mountain tops, hilltop shrines, or observation decks, which is why Miyagi thinks Sendai is just stretching the definition again. ↩︎

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