As long as it was a school day, I could call for Sendai-san whenever I wanted—whether I had a reason to or not. Until recently, I’d only ask her over on days when I was feeling down, but now I’d started inviting her simply because I felt like it.
Today was one of those days.
Still, instead of the 24th or 25th, I chose the 23rd, the last day of the semester, to have her over. Knowing her, she’d likely have plans around Christmas, and I also had plans to hang out with Maika. Besides, I felt it was best to avoid dates that were too memorable.
I wasn’t sure what Sendai-san thought of all this, though.
I came back to my room with cups of black tea and snacks for both of us. Sendai-san was lounging there as usual, with two buttons of her blouse undone. After setting down the tray on the table between us and taking my seat, Sendai-san pointed to one of the small square treats.
「What’s this?」
「It’s a fudge square.」
「Fudge?」
「It’s some kind of English dessert. My father was the one who brought it home.」
「How does it taste?」
It seemed to be her first time seeing fudge, so instead of tasting it, she just stared at the small block, studying it closely.
「I mean, it’s basically just butter and sugar mixed with milk.」
「Uh, isn’t that insanely high in calories?」
「Yeah, probably. I had some yesterday, and it was unbelievably sweet.」
The brown square looked like a chunk of caramel, but once it touched your tongue, it crumbled into something at least ten times sweeter. It wasn’t just sugary; the rich milk flavor made you want to go for more.
「Oh, so that’s why you brought us black tea.」
「Did you want barley tea instead?」
「No, anything non-carbonated is fine. I’m just surprised—it’s rare to see you drink anything that isn’t soda.」
Sendai-san said as she picked up a piece of fudge.
「It’s also rare for you to bring out snacks for us. Is this supposed to be an early Christmas celebration?」
「No. I just figured, since it was something I had at home already, it wouldn’t hurt to serve it.」
「I see.」
I thought she might tease me, but instead, Sendai-san put the fudge square in her mouth, chewing it slowly before swallowing. She raised her eyebrows, saying,
「It’s good, but I feel like it’s something you shouldn’t eat too much of.」
She sipped her tea carefully, then put the cup—about a third empty—back down. She reached for another piece of fudge but paused, her hand returning to her teacup.
「Sendai-san, open your mouth.」
I said, holding a piece of fudge up in front of her.
「Is that an order?」
「Yep.」
After I confirmed that it was an order, Sendai-san opened her mouth reluctantly. I brought the treat closer, pressing it lightly to her lips, feeling the soft warmth of them brush against my fingertips. I’d touched her skin plenty of times before, usually while feeling the necklace around her neck, but her lips had a softness that was different, more delicate.
For a moment, I lingered, wanting to savor that gentle softness—but I quickly snapped out of it, pushing the sweet treat into Sendai-san’s mouth.
「It’s so sweet.」
She murmured as she chewed, echoing what I’d said the day before. Once she’d swallowed it, I picked up another piece and held it to her lips.
「Have this one too.」
Sendai-san opened her mouth obediently, and I pushed the caramel-colored treat inside, letting my fingers graze her lips a bit more than before. This time, as her lips closed around the candy, I didn’t pull away immediately, lingering a bit longer than necessary, causing her to take hold of my wrist.
「You should have some too, Miyagi.」
She said, letting go of my wrist before even finishing the treat. She reached over for another piece, but before she could grab one, I snatched one up myself.
「I’ll eat it myself.」
I didn’t really feel like eating any more fudge, especially after the pieces I had yesterday and the three I’d already eaten before Sendai-san got here. Really, I’d only brought them out for her to try—not that I’d ever mention that to her.
Even if I told her I wasn’t in the mood for more, she’d probably find a way to make me eat it anyway. So, instead, I just popped the treat into my mouth.
「It really is sweet.」
I muttered, repeating the same words she’d said earlier, before taking a sip of my tea. Then, Sendai-san quietly asked,
「Hey, Miyagi… Are you hanging out with Utsunomiya on Christmas?」
「Yeah, I am. Do you have plans with Ibaraki-san?」
「Umina’s going on a date with someone, so I’ll be spending it with another friend.」
「Oh, I see.」
Unable to think of anything else, I gave a reply that left little room to continue the conversation. Sendai-san slid her teacup toward the edge of the table to make space for her textbooks, making it clear that there was nothing more to talk about. I couldn’t bring myself to say anything either.
She must have realized, as I did, that after today, we wouldn’t have any chances to see each other until after winter break. But she never brought it up.
Back before summer vacation, she’d kept talking about it, asking how I’d spend my time off. Seeing her so quiet about it now felt almost unnatural.
The only sounds beside me were the quiet flipping of textbook pages and the scratching of her pencil on paper. I took another sip of tea. She hadn’t offered to tutor me over winter break, and it didn’t seem like she planned to bring it up now, either.
I stood and moved to sit on my bed, unsure if I could say what I wanted to if I were sitting face-to-face with her.
「… What are you planning to do over winter break, Sendai-san?」
I asked, my voice softer than I’d intended.
「Study.」
Sendai-san replied, without turning around, as if the answer were obvious.
It was exactly what I expected.
With entrance exams coming up, there wasn’t much time to relax, and if she had extra time for tutoring, she should be using it to study for her own exams instead. It made sense, but I couldn’t bring myself to let the conversation end there.
「Are you planning on doing anything else?」
「Not really. Though I’ll at least go to a shrine with Umina on New Year’s Day.1」
She mentioned a name I didn’t want to hear in her winter plans.
―― What, so you’re willing to make time to see Ibaraki-san?
If she had that kind of free time on her hands, she should make time to see me, too.
「Sendai-san, come sit next to me.」
「Next to you?」
Sendai-san asked as she turned around.
「Yeah, that’s what I said. Were you not listening?」
「I was, but that came out of nowhere and had nothing to do with what we were just talking about. But anyway, is that supposed to be an order?」
「It is.」
I replied firmly, and with a resigned look, Sendai-san got up and sat next to me.
The bed creaked slightly as she settled beside me, and I felt my heart skip a beat, her warmth now closer than before.
「Okay, now what?」
「Close your eyes.」
「Why?」
Sendai-san stared at me, completely disregarding what I’d just asked of her.
「Fine, you don’t have to if you don’t want to.」
「Stop giving me these vague instructions and tell me what it is you actually want.」
「What are you talking about?」
「If you’re asking me to close my eyes because you want to kiss me, then just say it.」
How frustrating.
There were no other words for how I felt.
Sendai-san wasn’t wrong—I had asked her to close her eyes so I could kiss her. But the way she put it made it sound like I was the one desperate for it.
That wasn’t it at all.
The kiss I was about to give her wasn’t because I wanted it—it was because Sendai-san was always trying to kiss me. So, she had the wrong idea.
「Miyagi, you want to kiss me, don’t you?」
Sendai-san said firmly, noticing my silence and taking my hand.
「That’s not it, but… just close your eyes anyway.」
I needed to kiss her today.
There’d be no point in doing it after winter break.
I squeezed her hand in return, then gently gripped her blouse. Instead of giving her any more orders, I slowly pulled her closer, and she closed her eyes.
As I moved toward her, I felt as nervous as if this were our first kiss. In fact, my heart was probably beating three times faster than usual.
I wanted to stare at Sendai-san a bit longer before having to close my own eyes.
She really was beautiful whenever she stayed quiet. Her eyebrows were neatly shaped, her lashes not long but longer than mine, and her lips, which she’d always use to make fun of me with, were smooth and soft. Her eyes were prettier open than closed, but it’d be awkward for me if she were to open them now.
I leaned in and pressed my lips to hers. They felt softer and warmer than when I touched them with my fingertips—soft to the point where just touching them felt good.
I wanted to be with her a bit longer. But I knew I couldn’t keep clinging to her, so I pulled away and buried my face in her shoulder.
「… Come tutor me over winter break.」
I couldn’t bring myself to say it too loudly, but I managed to get the words out. I didn’t think my kisses were worth much, but Sendai-san seemed eager to kiss me all the time, so I figured it made for a decent trade.
「We’re not supposed to meet outside of school days, remember?」
Her voice was close to my ear, but her response wasn’t what I expected.
「You’re always breaking the rules, aren’t you, Sendai-san?」
「Does that mean you want to break them as well, Miyagi?」
Sendai-san tugged lightly at my hair.
「No, that’s not what I meant.」
「Does that mean you were just making a request from me, then?」
「No.」
「Okay, then, if that kiss wasn’t meant to be an order, and you weren’t asking me for a favor, does that mean you want to make a trade with me?」
I didn’t like this side of her. Even though she knew exactly what I was getting at, she still went out of her way to ask these pointless questions.
「It’s fine if you don’t want to.」
「I never said that, but if you’re trying to make a trade, you’re going to have to give me a more proper kiss than that.」
Sendai-san said as she hugged me, my forehead pressing firmly against her shoulder.
- Hatsumōde is an ancient and very popular tradition in Japan, where you visit a shrine or temple during the first couple days (usually the first day) at the start of the new year. Hatsumōde is called “the first visit to the shrine” (of the year), where you’d make prayers for good luck in the upcoming year. ↩︎
Ave Lilium Translations 